the only person that’s allowed to wear a fedora is perry the platypus
wow my brother was telling me this joke and he said
"if you’re fighting with a woman and she pulls a knife on you, just pull out the bread and cheese and meat and her womanly instincts will kick in and she’ll just make you a sandwich"
then all of a sudden our mom emerges from the kitchen holding a huge ass knife and she approaches my brother asking “sorry what was that?” and he started screaming
ah yes, the three most historically important revolutions. the russian, french, and dance dance
A flower for you, my lady.
Sloths are what happens when coconuts come alive
That comment makes sense